all politics. all religion
35 clues that you listen to Sean Hannity
1) you believe in "limited government"...
but have no problem with public employees ordering the torture of people to death half way around the world.
2) you believe in "personal responsibility"...
but think if you repeat John 3:16 often enough that somehow torturing a man to death 2000 years ago and washing yourself in his blood will miraculously absolve your responsibility for the sins you continue to commit.
3) you believe in the "rule of law"...
unless some new spooky villain comes along and threatens you. then the government can do whatever it wants to make you feel all safe and warm and cozy again.
4) you believe in the constitution...
but think the only part worth defending is the second amendment, and so long as you have a permit and do it a "free speech zone"
5) you believe in "freedom" ...
but won't hesitate to stoke a mob mentality and use tyranny of the majority in the name of "protecting families"
6) you believe in "states rights"...
but go running to the feds demanding marriage laws when more enlightened states decide to recognize gay marriage.
7) you believe "affirmative action" promotes lesser qualified candidates...
but think clarence thomas got to the supreme court on his merit alone.
8) you call yourself "pro-life"...
but believe in the death penalty and support the wars of imperialist aggression that the USA wages around the world.
9) you believe in "free-market solutions" for health care...
yet complain loudly when organized labor is able to negotiate better health benefits than the crappy health insurance your family got stuck with.
10) you believe that America is #1...
but you've never left the country.
11) you believe "climate change" is a hoax...
but sincerely believe that a man walked on water.
12) you believe in "free-market supply-side solutions" for energy policy, as in "drill here, drill now"...
but completely reject "free-market demand-side solutions" such as... conserving....
13) you believe big business when they tell you they need to pay top executives hundreds of millions to "retain talent"...
and that blue-collar wages need to be slashed to "remain competitive".
14) you believe the government can't do anything right...
in spite of NASA putting men on the moon and safely returning them.
15) you believe that ronald reagans bad economic times were jimmy carters fault...
yet barack obamas bad economic times are his own fault.
16) you believe investigating a blow job is appropriate use of taxpayer funds...
yet investigating 911 is wasteful.
17) you believe "your home is your castle"...
unless you are a black professor, then you should respect authority.
18) you believe that sean hannity is a "great american"...
despite the fact that he really hasn't done anything "great" other than build his own personal fortune by parroting talking points.
19) you believe barack obama uses too many "bumpers stickers", "slogans", and "platitudes"...
because hannity repeated it so often that it became a bumper sticker, a slogan, a platitude.
20) you believe barack obama is a "dangerous radical" because he is neighbors with a terrorist who never killed anyone...
but george w bush is a "great american" for starting a war that has killed 101,006 iraqis.
21) you believe reaganomics works...
despite bush senior not getting re-elected... remember, "its the economy, stupid"?... but thats still jimmy carters fault.
22) you believe in jesus words to "turn the other cheek"...
yet insist on "eye for an eye" old-testament blood-thirsty retribution.
23) you believe the wealthiest people should be given a tax break, because one day you, too, will be that wealthy...
in spite of the fact that you are still living paycheck to paycheck.
24) you believe there is no way mans actions have any environmental consequences...
in spite of acid rain, an ozone hole, rain manipulation, and DDT nearly destroying the bald eagle.
25) you believe george w bushs job was " to keep americans safe"...
in spite of oath of office of the president of the united states to "preserve, protect and defend the constitution of the united states" (notice there is no "so help me god" or other extra words in the official version?)
26) you actually believe that "bush kept us safe"...
in spite of 3,017 dead on 911, 5 dead via anthrax WMD attack (on us soil), 1317 us troops dead in afghanistan, 4645 dead us troops in iraq
27) you believe in exporting democracy...
yet insist that conservative officials "remain principled" and refuse to negotiate with (america hating) liberals.
28) believe that a 150 year sentence an old white guy convicted of bilking billions of dollars and the life savings of dozens of people is "class warfare"...
yet think a mandatory life sentence for shoplifting 3 times is even-handed justice.
29) you are proud of your civil rights history...
and paradoxically proud of your current civil rights record.
30) believe GOP still represents mainstream american thinking...
in spite of going from a "permanent republican majority" to a filibuster-less minority in last 3 elections.
31) believe americans have the best health care system in the world...
but cant find a source to cite.
32) believe hannity is a conservative...
or that hannity expresses your sentiments, instead of the other way around.
33) you still believe in "personal responsibility and accountability"...
even though while you read this, instead of having a moment of self-reflection, you spent your time thinking of excuses or a way to blame a liberal for all of your failures.
34) you believe bill clinton was (more) responsible for 911...
and that after 6 months on the job barack obama is responsible current events.
35) you believe you are well informed of current events...
in spite of the fact that people are better informed when listening to comedians who mock conservative personalities.
sean hannity has one inherent problem he will never be able to overcome. the nature of his job as a full time propaganda peddler requires that he speaks far more than he listens...
but have no problem with public employees ordering the torture of people to death half way around the world.
2) you believe in "personal responsibility"...
but think if you repeat John 3:16 often enough that somehow torturing a man to death 2000 years ago and washing yourself in his blood will miraculously absolve your responsibility for the sins you continue to commit.
3) you believe in the "rule of law"...
unless some new spooky villain comes along and threatens you. then the government can do whatever it wants to make you feel all safe and warm and cozy again.
4) you believe in the constitution...
but think the only part worth defending is the second amendment, and so long as you have a permit and do it a "free speech zone"
5) you believe in "freedom" ...
but won't hesitate to stoke a mob mentality and use tyranny of the majority in the name of "protecting families"
6) you believe in "states rights"...
but go running to the feds demanding marriage laws when more enlightened states decide to recognize gay marriage.
7) you believe "affirmative action" promotes lesser qualified candidates...
but think clarence thomas got to the supreme court on his merit alone.
8) you call yourself "pro-life"...
but believe in the death penalty and support the wars of imperialist aggression that the USA wages around the world.
9) you believe in "free-market solutions" for health care...
yet complain loudly when organized labor is able to negotiate better health benefits than the crappy health insurance your family got stuck with.
10) you believe that America is #1...
but you've never left the country.
11) you believe "climate change" is a hoax...
but sincerely believe that a man walked on water.
12) you believe in "free-market supply-side solutions" for energy policy, as in "drill here, drill now"...
but completely reject "free-market demand-side solutions" such as... conserving....
13) you believe big business when they tell you they need to pay top executives hundreds of millions to "retain talent"...
and that blue-collar wages need to be slashed to "remain competitive".
14) you believe the government can't do anything right...
in spite of NASA putting men on the moon and safely returning them.
15) you believe that ronald reagans bad economic times were jimmy carters fault...
yet barack obamas bad economic times are his own fault.
16) you believe investigating a blow job is appropriate use of taxpayer funds...
yet investigating 911 is wasteful.
17) you believe "your home is your castle"...
unless you are a black professor, then you should respect authority.
18) you believe that sean hannity is a "great american"...
despite the fact that he really hasn't done anything "great" other than build his own personal fortune by parroting talking points.
19) you believe barack obama uses too many "bumpers stickers", "slogans", and "platitudes"...
because hannity repeated it so often that it became a bumper sticker, a slogan, a platitude.
20) you believe barack obama is a "dangerous radical" because he is neighbors with a terrorist who never killed anyone...
but george w bush is a "great american" for starting a war that has killed 101,006 iraqis.
21) you believe reaganomics works...
despite bush senior not getting re-elected... remember, "its the economy, stupid"?... but thats still jimmy carters fault.
22) you believe in jesus words to "turn the other cheek"...
yet insist on "eye for an eye" old-testament blood-thirsty retribution.
23) you believe the wealthiest people should be given a tax break, because one day you, too, will be that wealthy...
in spite of the fact that you are still living paycheck to paycheck.
24) you believe there is no way mans actions have any environmental consequences...
in spite of acid rain, an ozone hole, rain manipulation, and DDT nearly destroying the bald eagle.
25) you believe george w bushs job was " to keep americans safe"...
in spite of oath of office of the president of the united states to "preserve, protect and defend the constitution of the united states" (notice there is no "so help me god" or other extra words in the official version?)
26) you actually believe that "bush kept us safe"...
in spite of 3,017 dead on 911, 5 dead via anthrax WMD attack (on us soil), 1317 us troops dead in afghanistan, 4645 dead us troops in iraq
27) you believe in exporting democracy...
yet insist that conservative officials "remain principled" and refuse to negotiate with (america hating) liberals.
28) believe that a 150 year sentence an old white guy convicted of bilking billions of dollars and the life savings of dozens of people is "class warfare"...
yet think a mandatory life sentence for shoplifting 3 times is even-handed justice.
29) you are proud of your civil rights history...
and paradoxically proud of your current civil rights record.
30) believe GOP still represents mainstream american thinking...
in spite of going from a "permanent republican majority" to a filibuster-less minority in last 3 elections.
31) believe americans have the best health care system in the world...
but cant find a source to cite.
32) believe hannity is a conservative...
or that hannity expresses your sentiments, instead of the other way around.
33) you still believe in "personal responsibility and accountability"...
even though while you read this, instead of having a moment of self-reflection, you spent your time thinking of excuses or a way to blame a liberal for all of your failures.
34) you believe bill clinton was (more) responsible for 911...
and that after 6 months on the job barack obama is responsible current events.
35) you believe you are well informed of current events...
in spite of the fact that people are better informed when listening to comedians who mock conservative personalities.
sean hannity has one inherent problem he will never be able to overcome. the nature of his job as a full time propaganda peddler requires that he speaks far more than he listens...
Add a Comment
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Comment by asdf asdf asdf on August 28, 2009 at 1:30pm - Who's Sean Hannity?
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Comment by Dan Thomas on August 4, 2009 at 9:03pm - This is great! So,so true. All the hypocrisy of the so-called "religious right" is sickening. I would add one: The same people who are for our current health care system are also the ones who smoke two packs of cigarettes a day and eat drive-thru garbage and down a twelve pack every night.
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Comment by Tess Elliott on July 29, 2009 at 6:04pm - I think I added my comment as a profile. It is important to really believe in something but I find contradictions like in this post everywhere, like gay men still going to Catholic Church. I learned something important though: there are differences in small proportions, like some gay friends--and there are differences in gigantic proportions. Most of my friends are not experts, and neither am I, but I try to be well-informed. At some point, there are things you can't excuse. You can become a guerilla fighter and work from the inside, or you can become the enemy and fight in plain sight. It is ALL GOOD. But to believe these conflicting beliefs is the kind of "designer" belief system I really hate: you want to belong somewhere, and you see a "subset" you mostly like and join--not because you buy everything, but just because they support your favorite positions. That's a terrible message that you can be bought. What we, as individuals, stand for is just about all we really have. NO job, no bank account, no power however fleeting, is going to take the place of being grounded in what you actually believe without any compromise. Be authentic, and figure it out!
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Comment by Rushelle Phillips on July 29, 2009 at 2:09pm
- THIS IS GREAT!!! Love the post It was so on point.
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Comment by Ana Lemos on July 29, 2009 at 1:49pm
- I agree 100% with you! you should add that the US does have good health care...FOR AN EXORBITANT AMOUNT. lol
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